Mark Harmon’s Wife Has Finally Revealed The Truth Behind The Couple’s 31-Year Marriage

Mark Harmon and his wife, Pam Dawber, have been married for 31 years. So you could argue that the two actors are one of few couples in Hollywood whose relationship has stood the test of time. But now Dawber has revealed an astonishing secret about the couple’s 31-year marriage.

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Harmon is of course best known for his long-standing role as the star of NCIS. Born in Burbank, California, on September 2, 1951, he is the son of actress Elyse Knox and football legend Tom Harmon. Yet although he’s now an extremely successful television actor, Harmon started out his working life as a carpenter.

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The 67-year-old actually began acting in the 1970s but didn’t get his big break until the next decade. In 1981, in fact, he appeared in the short-lived TV series Flamingo Road. Then, two years later, he landed the role of Dr. Robert Caldwell in St. Elsewhere. Harmon also portrayed notorious serial killer Ted Bundy in 1986’s The Deliberate Stranger.

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After that, the actor went on to become a household name with performances in Reasonable Doubts, Chicago Hope and The West Wing, among other things. He then landed the lead role of Leroy Jethro Gibbs on NCIS, which he has starred in since 2003. And throughout his rise to superstardom, Harmon has had Dawber by his side.

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Dawber was born on October 18, 1951, in Detroit, Michigan. She started her career as a model and was picked for ABC’s talent program after unsuccessfully auditioning for Bewitched spinoff series Tabitha. There she was noticed by Garry Marshall, who then cast her in Mork & Mindy, which ran from 1978 to 1982.

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Both unknown actors at the time, Dawber and her co-star Robin Williams had their careers launched by the series about an alien who comes to Earth. When the show was over, Dawber then landed a lead role in My Sister Sam. But after that show ended in 1988, Dawber took a step back from the spotlight.

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The previous year, you see, the actress had married Harmon in a private wedding. Then on April 25, 1988, the pair welcomed their son Sean, while their son Ty was born on June 25, 1992. And almost 30 years after the couple tied the knot, Dawber finally spoke out about her marriage.

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During an interview with Entertainment Tonight in November 2016, Dawber shared the secret to their rock-solid relationship. And surprisingly she explained that putting her family first and leaving fame behind is what has kept her marriage strong. “I don’t think two people can work all the time in show business and stay married,” she said.

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Dawber added that she had already had a very successful career by the time she had become a mom, so stepping back from Hollywood hadn’t been a big decision to make. She said, “I was in a number one show. I had my own deal. I got to do Broadway. I got to do musical theater. I got to do cartoon voices. I did everything you can do in this business, and then I had children, and it’s like, ‘I’m not going to chase this fame thing.’”

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The star also revealed that motherhood had totally changed her priorities. Dawber said, “I wanted to drive my kids to school. I wanted to be there for their birthdays and bring cupcakes and donuts and do the school festivals and all that, and I did.” She later added, “I got to teach in their art class and so it was a different life then, and I was very happy to do it.”

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The revelations were all the more surprising because Harmon and Dawber are famously private and rarely talk about their relationship in the media. Yet the 66-year-old declared that this was also part of what had ensured that their marriage lasted. The couple prefer to keep their family life out of the public eye, Dawber said, and she apparently disapproves of celebrities who do the opposite.

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“Notice you don’t see us in the magazines,” the mom-of-two said when told that she and Harmon were thought of as the “It” couple. Dawber added, “When you’re married, that’s real life. And to go and plaster your kids… I’m sorry. I’m not for that.”

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Sean and Ty are now 30 and 26, respectively, and the elder brother is following in his parents’ footsteps by working as an actor. He has in fact appeared in several episodes of NCIS as a young version of his father’s character. But Dawber admits that her sons haven’t watched her work – and she’s fine with that.

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“My kids have never seen anything I’ve done. I’m just their mom. They don’t care about what I did. They care about what they are doing,” she told Entertainment Tonight. “They want their parents to care about what they are doing.”

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And she confessed that her sons are dealing with the strains of being the children of celebrities mostly because of Harmon’s success, so she wouldn’t want to add to that. “Their father is already iconic enough for two boys,” Dawber said. “I am just the mom.”

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After she revealed how she makes it work with her husband, fans voiced their support for her decision to swap the spotlight for her family. “Pam and Mark, my dream couple. They are so beautiful together,” one person shared. “Love the thought of them as a great Hollywood couple who are keeping it real.”

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Another added, “Mark is my favorite actor, and it’s excellent that Mark and Pam have such a beautiful relationship. Love you guys.” And one commenter agreed, “Mark Harmon always kept his family away from his acting work. That is meritorious. Work and live your life without complications of the press.”

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Yet although Dawber has put her kids first, she continued with small roles in television films and shows after becoming a mom. In 2014, for example, her Mork & Mindy co-star Williams persuaded her to appear in an episode of his comedy series The Crazy Ones. This was the same year as Williams’ death, and Dawber broke down in tears as she discussed her late friend with Entertainment Tonight.

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“I hadn’t seen Robin for 20 years,” she said. And she added, “I did that episode because I wanted to be with Robin. I wanted to see Robin. That was a gift. That was such a gift.” Dawber’s most recent role was an episode of The Odd Couple that served as a tribute to Marshall, who created the original series in 1970 and died in 2016.

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Meanwhile, Harmon continues to star in NCIS, which is now in its 16th season. And although the couple seldom talk about their romance, it’s clear that they couldn’t be more in love. Dawber previously told InStyle, “He’s one of those guys who makes you say, ‘They don’t make them like that anymore.’”